3…2….1….and Rolling

The media is useless…media should be banned…media is causing all this trauma….media is acting irresponsible….media this media that…..

In the last few months I have heard a LOT of media bashing…so much so, some people have even tagged me as "the mediaperson" to be beware of. Everytime a crisis situation arises in our country, the media and politicians are the first targets. While it is the latter that should be held more responsible for problems in our country, I don't realize why some people cry foul at the media.

For starters, Media is just a medium. It is not the authority. So whatever is said and suggested by the media, it is just the voice of a number of people. Everyone enjoys pointing a finger at the media, but has anyone ever wondered the hardship that media goes through?? To talk about the recent Mumbai terrorist attacks, people were all out blaming media. If we were so bad and irresponsible, why were millions of Indians glued to news channels for all 3 days. Couldn't they have switched their channel to saas bahu serials. If you don't like what you see, u have the choice to change it by the click of a button. The truth is you wanted the news but it needed to be according to your taste. In a country with millions its very difficult to serve news according to each individual taste.

I am not glorifying media but I am fed up of this media bashing. I do agree that there are times where media has faltered, but then there are many times were media's interference has caused a lot of help than harm. Like the Jessica Lal murder case. Had it not been for media blowing the case out of proportion maybe her real killers would be sitting in another bar today and shooting some more innocent girls. Even to talk about the recent attacks, had it not been for media adding pressure on the politician's, maybe even today RR Patil and Deshmukh would still be in their respective positions and allowing the blasted sites as locations for some movie.

I personally hate it when people look at me and say "you media people" like i am some sort of alien from another planet. We are people just like you. We report for people. Not many understand the dynamics of this job. On one hand you may not want to stick the mike on the face of someone who has just lost their husband in an attack but on the other hand you have 20 other channels who are doing the same thing. And if you don't do it then you have you senior editor telling you why you dint get that "exclusive". The truth is even you like to hear these stories. Stories of survivors, stories of people who have lost near and dear ones. But when we do interview them you call us "insensitive". They say media is a double edged sword and I do agree with that. What media needs to know is which side of the sword to use and when.

Love – That beautiful and ugly feeling!!!

Before you think here we go again…another article on Love…hold that thought…coz this not a preachy article but a first hand report of a person who WAS in love….and NO that person is not Me!!!

Well…this is the story of one of my very close friends…a person who people looked up to as someone with a steady mind, someone who was a practical and balanced person, someone who always had her head on her shoulders, someone who people could count when they lost control of their life, someone who never wore her heart on the sleeve, someone sensible….till Love struck her.

Someone said ‘the best poems are written when in pain, and the best poets are the ones who have experienced heartbreak.’ How true that someone was. Because if you go by what my friend say’s she experienced in love, you will believe every word said in this phase.

When she watched people in love and saying I’ll do anything for you, she would laugh!....”bullshit I’ll do anything for him” was her reply….till she met her boyfriend. Having had boyfriends before, it’s not like she had not experienced the whole romantic feeling. But like they say ‘the intensity of love is best felt when in Love’. Here was a guy totally mismatched for her. Nothing in him or abt him wud have fit into her “typical” boyfriend category. He was a flirt, sweet talker, charmer from the word go, dishonest and of a diff religion to add to the list. Yet, knowing well before getting into the relationship that she is only gonna burn her hands in this relationship, she cudnt help but say YES to him. He slowly grew on her. And she felt that she needed him more than he needed her. Suddenly she was possessive abt him more than he was. The usual couple fights also added to the charm in the relationship. Her callertunes wud reveal her state of mind. A ‘Ya Rabba’ wud mean that she just had a fight and a ‘Your still the One’ wud mean that things are lovey-dovey.

And then the separation period started. Despite her best attempts, distance was something she cudnt cover up. Gradually they separated. But not before the unbearable pain and trauma that she under went that took her one yr to get over with. The nights were never ending and the tears just kept flowing like alcohol in an open bar. Life she thought cud never be the same…she cud never be the same.

So why do I write about love u ask….well simply to let people know that love is that heady feeling that gives you all the ecstasy you want to take you to a height you’ve never thought existed and also drop you so low that the only things surviving over there would be the decayed and rotten creatures of the earth. "But at the end of the day it is better to have loved and lost than to have not loved at all… Love is the feeling of reaching the doors of heaven….a hunger that is more difficult to conquer than the hunger of bread"… These are not my words, this is what my friend says….and I say Amen to that!!

Hmmmmm.......

Some like it big, some like it small. Some like it hard, some like it soft. Some like it coloured, some like it dotted. Well….....I like it in ALL shapes and sizes!!!

I must make one true confession before I die and that is I LOVE BAGS AND SHOES…I have a passion for fashion... I am a sucker for them and have a huge soft corner for bags of all sizes, textures and colours. And I love shoes also in all types of heels, variety and colours…I know all the men reading this must be yawning by now and goin ‘wat is the big deal about shoes and bags’. That is precisely why I thought I shud dedicate a post on them. I don’t understand how men don’t understand that bags and shoes are as important as skin is to the human body! If I don’t have them with me, I feel naked…and it is not the mere thing of wearing them, they need to be sophisticated and stylish too.

I am so obsessed with them that I removed all my footwear from the rack recently to click a snap of them so that it is easier to know if a pair is missing. And while I was marveling and admiring at my wonderful and humongous collection I heard my dad in the background say “You have too many footwear lady. See you have 6 of them in black and two of the same kind.” Now what my innocent dad did not notice or bother to notice was that those 6 pairs in black were of different heels, cuts and fabric. And also the 2 pair of sneakers that he said were same where actually of Different colours!!! I was appalled at my dad’s lack of observation. But then again I thought maybe any guy would probably say this. Why is it difficult for a man to understand that most women also come with an excess baggage of accessories that includes bags, shoes, belts, earrings and the like??? Is it that bad to invest some of your hard earned money on a nice pair of footwear and/or bags? And what abt the stupid things that men buy like playstation, hair gels, and of course the amount of money they spend on beer!!!

Well for all the women in the world who have a similar sickness (I don’t knw if that word puts me in a gud light) like me, here’s wat I have to say….go splurge girl…coz money can cum and go and so will boys but a bag/shoe that u like today will go out of fashion tomorrow, so pick it up rite now! Life is too long to ponder and fashion changes before you blink.

I think my tombstone should read, ‘Dency Mathew - Died in Pursuit of Happiness…..in Pursuit of MORE bags and shoes’

Man! I feel like a woMAN

So you just saw the guy standing beside you wearing Nike shoes, a Dolce Gabbana shirt with Calvin Klein belt on the latest Levi jeans. Well, you think he’s gay. But hold that thought. He isn’t gay because you just saw him kiss a beautiful girl. A guy who’s not gay yet so stylish. How is that possible?

Metrosexual is thy name. A metrosexual man always looks perfectly put together. He can be in a t-shirt and jeans or heading out to a black tie event. His hair never has a bad day. His nails are always clean. His clothes are perfectly pressed and neatly coordinated. He smells like flowers. He is a normal straight male who possesses qualities of a gay male without being attracted to men.

I found it hard to understand the term metrosexual. But it wasn’t too hard as I had a living example of a metrosexual man in my house. It all began when I noticed that every week my face cream was vanishing more than I was using it. Hence one day I questioned my mom about it. But she flatly denied ever using my cream. It was only a few weeks later that I noticed my brother sitting with his laptop (a typical sign of masculinity- man with his gadget) with his face covered in my cream (a typical sign of femininity – women and her cream) that I uncovered the mystery behind my vanishing face cream. I wanted to laugh at this pretty sight, but it was then that I realized that it was foolish on my part to think that men cannot groom themselves. I would often find my brother applying moisturizers and lotions to his face. He even had a hand and feet cream to help keep them soft and smelling good always – something that I never had or bothered to buy. It was only on the day that he brought himself a ‘pink’ shirt that I was convinced that there was more to my brother’s feminine taste than what meets the eye. He had not only crossed the line of masculinity but also surpassed the line of femininity!

I was getting more and more intrigued by this sudden development of feminine tastes in my brother’s choices. So I decided to do a little investigation into his life. One day as I was on my way back home from college, I saw my brother walk into a Lakme salon. In normal circumstances, I would have not even raised an eyebrow. But the fact that this was my brother’s second visit to the salon in one month got me a little curious. I walked right in too, in the pretext of finding the rates of the salon for a haircut. And Voila! What do I see? My brother sitting with a female attendant doing his eyebrows. This sight was enough for me to fall flat on the floor. But the sight of three other men in the salon in similar situation and one man waxing his hands made me want to run from the place to a place where men are still men and are still hairy!!!

The term metrosexual was coined by British journalist Mark Simpson in 1994 to refer to a new breed of young metropolitan males who had a strong aesthetic sense and spent a great deal of time and money on their appearance and lifestyle. Not surprisingly, magazines eagerly pounced on it and used the expression. The word became more popular after Simpson wrote an article in 2002 projecting the soccer star David Beckham as a metrosexual man. David Beckham soon became the epitome of this new cult of males- a man who wasn’t afraid to show off his feminine side without losing his masculinity. Metrosexuality was considered a western phenomenon and was thought to be existent only in America. However, it was not too long ago that the Indian markets also capitalized on this phenomenon and made heterosexual males like Shah Rukh Khan and Saif Ali Khan into metrosexual males. In fact, recently Shah Rukh Khan even appeared in a soap advertisement with rose petals surrounding him in a bath tub and now he is considered the icon of Indian metrosexual.

In today’s world, a physically attractive personality is very important. Men don’t want to be far behind in this race and want to walk with women if not overtake them. There are more salons opened for men today than before. There are also more men visiting them and having a pedicure, manicure and facial than before and they don’t have any qualms admitting it. These are the guys with whom you shop till you drop. They can discuss fashion, will notice your great new shoes and buy their grooming products from the same places you do. You can actually ‘talk’ to these guys about something other than sports, cars and other traditional male interests. Being metrosexual is almost synonymous to being stylish.

Some of the things that clearly distinguish a metrosexual male from a heterosexual are:
They own 20 pairs of shoes, half a dozen pairs of sunglasses, just as many watches and they carry a man-purse. They see a stylist instead of barbers because barbers don’t do highlights. They shave more than just their face. They also exfoliate and moisturize. They can’t imagine a day without hair styling products and would rather drink wine than beer.

Metrosexual men are a phenomenon that we cant run away from. These men are here to stay. Whether it is a strategic tactic used by the fashion and media industry is still debatable. Yet these men are all around us. In our college, offices, locality etc as our friend, boyfriend or even maybe your Brother!

So next time you bump into a guy who is cool, smart, attractive, stylish and cultured, don’t be afraid to ask him out for a date. Take my word. He’s not gay, but just ‘METROSEXUAL’.

My Mumbai or Yours??

Well...i dont need to explain too much into why i write this post...i hope i can be the voice of every true MUMBAIKAR.....

With all this hooplah-hoo about whose mumbai is it anyway...i wud just like to say both Raj Thackarey and Amar Singh are idiots....this is neither the land of maharashtrians nor of UP-Biharis...this is the land of the Koli's...the original inhabitants of Mumbai...wen they have no issue with the influx of non koli's into the city who the hell is raj thackarey to object...

People shud stop claiming Mumbai as their own..this city is the melting point of a lot of cultures,religions,languages and traditions....and i think that is the USP of the city...it accomadates every person and braces them as their own....

I have lived in Delhi for nearly a year and i cudnt feel more out of place...though a highly cosmopolitant city with an amazing infrastruture to its credit, i cudnt feel more homeless....i guess being born and brought up in mumbai u fall in love with the city and its people...My native land is Kerala and i cant connect with tht state either...i will probably never feel connected to it except for the fact tht it is my native land...

It pinches wen you see morons on the roads playing a thug of war for my city....it does not belong to an individual or religion or caste or language...it belongs to anyone who wants to fall in Love with the city...anyone who is willing to absorb himself/herself into the city's culture and pace...
if not ur not welcome to my city.....be it north indians, south inidans ,west indians or east indians...

If only the city could talk....its exact words wud be 'BUG OFF!'

2007 - The Year that Was

Wat a Year!!! Gamut of emotions rocked me throughout....

There was so much happening in a single year for me tht i think by far this has been the best year for me.......i still remember starting the year wit a concert on 31st wer A R Rehman was performing...and was partyin till wee hours in the mornin....and the year has just been tht....a big fat PARTY year......

Beginning the year by visiting heartbreak hotel which i vacated in a few months to my only sibling getting married and a new member joining the Mathew clan to me having the experience of living it up and alone in Delhi......the year has been one gud jolly ride.....

Now for more intricate details.....

I am not gonna spell out details of my heartbeak as i think its a waste of cyberspace and time......

Bro 'n' Bhabhi

The big fat 'Mathew' wedding - well finally my brother has gotten hitched and hitched well.....my sis-in-law is the most pretty and composed 23 yr old i have met.....she oozes confidence and charishma.....and i am not just sayin it coz she is in the family now but i seriously think so too.....the wedding was one big fat affair that caused a few palpitations to my dad and made him cry all the way to the bank......but at the end of the day it was a wedding that was put together perfectely only because of the  best event manager ever - my Dad.....kudos to you dad....

Next me shifting base to New Delhi - This has probably been the most cherished and wonderful part of the year 2007.....made some good friends at CNN-IBN and had amazing and cool roommates.....this is where i want to thank a few of you who made my short and brief stint in Delhi memorable.

With the CNN-IBNites

First i wud like to thank Vinay Tiwari...yes without you i wudnt land up in CNN-IBN and made such wonderful friends...
My roommates - Nupur, Preeti and Swetha......you guys rocked and loved every day staying with you'll....Nupur aka gurudu-stop causing flood...Preeti aka PTS - you owe some money...hehe...Swetha aka Balams - your sincerity and perseverance towards work is what i hope i can inculcate in my children....not me....hehe
CNN-IBNites:Varun...my fightercock friend, Netra...my flirty friend, Priyanka Dube....my cutepie Baa, Smriti...my hot and smart friend, Atishay.....my sweety(wink wink), Altamash....my forever smiling friend, Rupha...my mom, Raheel...my urban dictionary guide, Ruchi...my forever ready to help friend....

Disappointments of 2007 were loosing out some of my good friends due to petty fights....some old and well tuned friendships shattered this year and that caused a few heartache......in retrospect i guess this made me more aware of who all are my true friends....wish all my friends the very best in the coming years......

Would like to thank a friend who was extremely wonderful, understanding and caring ....Sanyogita.

Next stop TIMES NOW......yes..new company, new friends, new environment in the new year.....well hope i have a gr8 2008 too.....

Will write my next post soon on my blog...so watch out for this space....

Adieus.....DM